I feel like I can’t be real or people won’t join in our ministry. I feel I can’t even mention how I’m worried about raising the support or what to say to people/churches or on the phone with pastors. I feel like if I’m real I will be judged. I’m sick of holding back who I am. It’s scary to be vulnerable, in fear that you won’t be liked. Sometimes I wonder if I could be completely real and vulnerable would it encourage others to know that they’re not alone? Do we ever really know other people? Our minds are constantly racing with thoughts and in the midst of those thoughts the enemy seems to twist us into believing that we are alone. No matter where we are in life we are NEVER alone! God is always on our side and he puts other people in our lives to help build us up and to withstand against the enemy. If we could all be a little more real and vulnerable then wouldn’t we truly know how to pray for our brothers and sisters in Christ?
So hear it goes: God has called my family to Africa. There is so much joy and peace that God has answered my deepest longing to serve alongside of my husband and reach the underprivileged and sometimes forgotten children and families. With this calling, come strong attacks from the enemy. Placing much stress and anxiety on my life. This transitional state has been difficult because there is much to do in addition to our daily routine from raising support to selling our home. When I begin to focus on the money needed, that’s where my worry becomes more prominent. Every day I have to take my worries to the Lord and leave them in His hands and some days are easier than others. At times, I just wish I could snap my fingers and our family would be in Africa and doing ministry. At the same time the struggles we have in life our building our character and allowing us to serve God in deeper capacities. My prayer is that today I will be free from worry and truly be able to release my concerns to the Lord. If Jesus can heal the blind, bring back the dead, then how much more can He provide the financial needs for us to begin our ministry in Tanzania. Today, pray for our family that God will release my worry and open the doors and hearts for others to begin to support us both through prayer and financial giving. Consider where God may be asking you to join in our ministry.
With much Love!
Deanna
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